Food for thought from Stepanie Ike

The root word for likeness in Hebrew is ‘damah’ meaning ‘thought.’ The original intention for man amongst others, was to think like God. For this reason, when God created the animals, Genesis 2:19 tells us, He brought them to Adam to see what he would call them. What’s fascinating is that “whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name.” Adam’s mind functioned like God; he knew the very names God had already assigned to the animals.

However, after the fall of man, we became sin conscious, our thinking was contaminated with evil. This is evident when a person is judgmental, or calling others names that dishonor whom God says they are. We ought to understand that regardless of the wrongs that people may do; that does not define them. A mind that is God conscious sees through the wrongdoing and is able to speak life and destiny.

A horse might act like a dog, for example, but if you treat it like a dog, you’ll never experience its true purpose. God has placed people in your life as purpose mates, but we often fail to identify them because we’re calling them by the wrong names.

Jesus died to restore all that had been lost, to give us freedom from sin, that we may also no longer operate from sin consciousness. So I pray for the grace to identify people according to their God given name.

Adapted from her Instagram.

Don't leave it broken... Fix it!!!

Have you ever had something missing in your life? It is irritating for something to be missing in your life. I can't stand anything broken in the house or generally around me, if it's broken i think you should either fix it or get rid of it. I don't want a toaster that doesn't work, because I can't stand to have things taking up space that serve no purpose. You see, if something is missing, it reminds me to replace it, but if it's broken and there, the impostor gives me a false sense of validation, that says "I don't need something that I really do need". I don't want a toaster just to look good on the counter if I can't put bread in it. I'd rather have an empty space, so it would remind me to buy one, than to have an impostor sit there, perpetrating something that it doesn't produce. And I realize it's just a matter of choosing irritants, whether you choose to be irritable by the emptiness of the counter, Or irritated by the fact that the toaster doesn't work is a matter of preference. 

But I would rather deal with the gravity of the empty feeling of something missing, than to have something in place that doesn't provide what I need.

 That is to say, if I'm gonna be broke I'd rather be without a job, if I'm gonna be lonely I want to be single. At least, when you roll over you're not expecting nothing, at least you don't have to get up and go to work only to still be broke. I'd rather have something missing, because if something is missing it can be filled. I want to talk to someone who knows the pain of something missing.

Some of the ways that we learn that something is missing is by looking at other people. Everybody in our lives in some way is an instructor, and we learn something is missing by determining what is normal. We learn what is normal by looking at other people and seeing what isn't the usual way of doing things through interacting with other people. 

We begin to understand that something is missing out of our lives, based on what we are exposed to. I've often wondered how people can be in bad situations and be comfortable. But then I realized, if you've never seen a good one, then the bad situation doesn't let you know that something's missing out of your life. The irritation comes once you are exposed to how it is supposed to be. Then you begin to become frustrated with how it is. 

Had Hannah not been exposed to a woman named Penina she would've been totally content with being married to Elkanah (In the Bible Hannah who eventually gave bith to Samuel couldn't bear children). After all he was a wealthy and successful man. Any woman who is married to a wealthy man who loves her the way he did Hannah, should've been content (1 Samuel 1:8 Her husband Elkanah would say to her, "Hannah, why are you weeping? Why don't you eat? Why are you downhearted? Don't I mean more to you than ten sons?") But she wasn't content. Hannah would've been content with what the situation was, except her husband had another wife who was having  babies. Which exposed Hannah to what should be there,  but isn't. And she reveals that something is missing in her life. 

You don't know that something is missing in your life until you're exposed to someone who's filled in the blanks in your life. And suddenly, you realize you need something  because you have been exposed to how it should be.

There are things that we accept as normal in our lives that are not part of our purpose. That's when God comes and fills in the blanks of your life. Sometimes, we make do for so long that we redefine what normal is. You start to allow circumstances to control your dreams. To the point that you stop dreaming for fear of disappointment. But you should never let go of what your dream is.

You have to get out of your uncomfortable situation and and get your dream out of the closet and step out into the unknown so God can work your dream into existence. You have to have that empty space so God can fill it with what is supposed to be there, not the impostor that is just taking up space and serving no purpose. 

The only reason you realize that something is missing is because you've been exposed to somebody who had it. Once you see it, you become frustrated because now you recognize that you're not getting what you need. And what you need is based on your exposure. Its only because of Penina's blessing that Hannah knows to want it. 

Sometimes God uses people who get on your nerves to bless you, He uses frustration to lead you to fate because frustration provokes you to go to God and say, I know I have all these fancy things but something is missing out of my life, and I cannot rest, until I fix it. You suddenly can't leave it broken, you have to fix it! Don't make do, fix it! Don't put up with it, fix it! Don't make the most of a bad situation, fix it! Don't endure it, fix it! Whatever you do, you have to fix it!!! God does fill in the blanks of your life, but the space has to be blank. So you need to get rid of the impostor so God can fix it while accomplishing His purpose.

I felt like a sermon today...

Stay Blessed

XoXo

Kampala Restaurant Week, I'm pumped... are YOU???

When you're a foodie like me, any opportunity to eat good food sounds like a terrific plan. So imagine my excitement when pearl Guide Uganda decided to organize Kampala Restaurant week!!! And if you're not a foodie, you're probably lost wondering what I'm going on about, but Fomo is probably killing you, because Ugandans and Fomo are like Bahima and cows... (<----see anyway...="" back="" did="" i="" kampala="" p="" restaurant="" there="" to="" week...="" what="">

What is it?: 12 days of early Christmas where 30  restaurants around Kampala will be serving their best dishes at discounted prices. multi-course Casual meals will be going  for UGX 15,000  and Signature menus for UGX 25,000

When is it?: 2nd to 13th June 2015 (and there's two public holidays!!!)

Where is it going to be?: Well the list is endless, But I picked out a few of my favorite restaurants top on the list being Mediterreano because thier lasagna is to die for...  More of my fave restaurants include: Mantra, The Bistro, La Patisserie and Piato. 

All I'm saying, is I will be hitting the gym after 13th June, because I plan to gain as much weight as I can during the Kla Restaurant week. Don't say I didn't tell you... see you there!!!!

You can check out the pearl guide Uganda website for more info here: http://thepearlguide.co.ug/kampala-restaurant-week/

Shine your light on their darkness

 Matt 5:16

16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.

The Devil is a Liar, I keep saying. Lately, it seems the Devil be looking for one or another to try me. He don't sleep I tell you. I used to have a short temper, I prayed about it and I've since become less temperamental. I'm also a very impatient person, although lately my tolerance for people and annoying situations has greatly improved. I no longer snap at people, or curse them out. I don't get urges of wanting to strangle the toxic person trying to try me. When faced with uncomfortable situations, I simply walk away, because I have learnt to tell myself, it's never worth the drama. 

But what do you do when the person bringing the drama is one you can't just walk away from. What do you do when you tell God to remove that thorn in your flesh, and He says "my Grace is sufficient for you". When the thorn in your flesh is someone you love and God has just refused to remove them from your life, yet you have decided to remove yourself from all drama and toxic situations in a bid to live a positive life? It can be quite uncomfortable.

 I recently had a one such situation, I was in the middle of drama I didn't even start, didn't want to be a part of, and I tried to walk away, but it just kept coming my way, that I snapped. When I awoke the next day, I felt disappointed in myself, because I was unable to handle the situation maturely, but sometimes you have to be the bigger person and understand that we're all human. So, I prayed about it, and asked God to give me clarity, that when it came to dealing with the situation I had better perspective and was able to forgive even without the other person apologizing.

 Although I originally stormed off in a dramatic exit, the next day I was able to resolve the situation after realizing that its part of the process of God making me a better person. God will allow you to be tested so that you can become more patient, understanding, forgiving, and compassionate.

 You can't be an over comer without overcoming obstacle. I'm glad that I was able to let my light shine instead of throwing blame, I was more understanding and the issue was resolved amicably. Being that we are all human and we all fall short sometime, we are bound to snap at the world sometime, So I didn't beat myself up too much after that. 

When you realize that you are God's vessel and are supposed to use your life to bring glory to Him, you put your personal feelings aside and be the bigger person. You let your light shine on the other person's darkness, because you might just be exactly what they needed to find their way out of their darkness. And sometimes they snap at you not because you're the problem but because they are dealing with a deeper issue and you just happened to be the scapegoat. 

So when next faced with difficult situations, remember to let your light shine instead of being consumed by someone else's darkness.

XoXo

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Be Kind Anyway...

I like to think of myself as a kind person, because I usually go out of my way to do stuff for people. Most of the time, I do them without expecting anything in return or at least I thought I did. This has most times led me to frustration. Especially when people don’t appreciate what I have done for them, or take my acts of kindness for granted. 

Sometimes when people don’t appreciate my efforts, I question my whole entire existence, which usually leads me to feeling unappreciated, unwanted and unworthy. I sometimes even get angry at God out of failure to understand why He tells us to be kind to people who clearly can’t even have the courtesy to say thank you for the act of kindness or at least appreciate the effort. I had one such experience recently. I went out of my way to do something nice for someone who by the way didn't even ask for what I was doing for them and as usual, when I didn't get the desired and expected sense of gratitude for my act of kindness, I almost threw a fit. It had actually become a thorn in my flesh, but as I was going about my usual routine of reading a chapter a day, I read something that put everything in perspective. 

I've been reading a book titled “Don’t sweat the small stuff” by Richard Carlson, P.H.D and If you have known me for a long time, then you probably know that I am the queen of overreacting. Like seriously, it’s like second nature to me. Then again, if you've been around me lately, you have probably noticed that my overreacting meter has been on hiatus. Thanks to this book. It’s the real deal but, that’s not what this post is about.

 Back to my act of kindness struggles… I was reading the book and came across this chapter entitled: DO A FAVOR AND DON’T ASK FOR, OR EXPECT, ONE IN RETURN. I had an epiphany; and suddenly I realized I had it wrong all along. All this while, instead of getting worked up because someone didn't say thank you, I could have just been rejoicing in the fact that I have been blessed enough to bless others with my kindness and that alone should be enough. The book goes on to say “It’s almost as if we keep score of our own good deeds rather than remembering that giving is its own reward”. I guess that’s why they say God loves a cheerful giver, because we should get our reward from the act of giving rather than from the appreciation of the act. I've been doing it wrong this whole time because I gave and expected to be thanked, or at the very least get some kind of acknowledgement that the person was grateful to me for my kindness and thoughtfulness, and that’s why instead of being happy it’s brought me frustration.

 People won’t always appreciate your efforts, your kindness or your love. It doesn't mean you should stop loving or stop being kind to them. When God blesses you, you must share in His blessings by blessing others. Don’t let the ungrateful people drag you down with them. Don’t become bitter or frustrated like I would, or let their darkness cloud your light. I have come to understand that instead, you should let your light shine on their darkness. They need it. Broken people spread hurt, bitterness and resentment, happy people spread love, kindness and good cheer because it comes as second nature. So don’t get discouraged when you feel like your kindness has hit a brick wall.  After all, it is more blessed to give than to receive.

 Remember, people won’t always receive your love, love anyway. People won’t always be grateful for your giving or sharing with them, give and share anyway. People won’t always appreciate your kindness or be kind in return, be kind anyway.

Remember that your reward is the feeling you receive in knowing that you participated in an act of kindness. You don’t need something in return or even a “thank you”.

So go ahead, do something nice for someone and don’t expect anything in return. Be kind anyway….

XoXo

Say hello to goodbye

2014 started on a crazy note and sadly on a low note. So crazy that I was sure it was going to be my worst year ever!!! Boy was I in for a surprise. I wont lie, this year has been crazy hectic. I have had to make a lot of tough decisions, I have lost some friends, some due to tragedies but some due to misunderstandings.

My circle has grown tremendously slow in 2014 mainly because I have grown up. I have learnt that its better to have a small loyal circle than have a crowd full of hypocrites. The struggles I went through made me stronger and wiser, I have gained clarity and gotten perspective. If someone had told me last year on this day that my life would be like this now, I never would have believed them.

But thank God for He makes all things work together for those who love him. I can proudly say I have been blessed in all aspects of my life, emotionally, physically, psychologically. He turned my mourning into dancing, turned my ashes to beauty, filled my cup and its overflowing.

As the year draws to a close, everything comes into perspective, so I would like to take a moment to apologize to those who I have wronged, I'm sorry. Do bear with my imperfections as I continue to grow from my flaws. To those that stayed with me through the hardships, I'm humbled by your unconditional love. To those that contributed to my low moments, I forgive you because I understand that you were all part of  God's plan to get me to where I needed to be. To those that contributed to the realization of my dreams, Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!!! I celebrate you all, because I wouldn't be the person I am today, without all your input.
The year ahead makes me a bit scared, because I know that I have big shoes to fill, more responsibilities to take on and a world full of uncertainty to step into, But I know that whatever happens, I will be okay regardless, because In the end everything will work out as it should.
 Goodbye 2014... Hello 2015. I'M READY!!!!
XoXo

My Blessing in Disguise

A little over a year ago, I found myself between a rock and a hard place, 2013 was the most difficult and trying year of my life. So trying that when I look back I can't believe I made it through alive and into 2014 because there was a time when I just didn't want to deal with the world. The icing on the cake came when I got a transfer at work that I wasn't too excited about because I thought it was taking me away from my desired career path. I remember trying so hard to resist it, but after going back and forth about it, and talking to my parents, I decided to take the leap of faith and see what the waters had for me. 

Settling in, was difficult. I wont lie. Even with my determination to make lemonade with the "lemons" life had thrown at me, it was outright difficult. So, I prayed about it, and decided to give my every last bit of energy to this new career path and see what it has to offer. A year later: NO REGRETS!!!! I recently got promoted at work, about four days ago to be exact and i'll tell you that had I stayed, this promotion would've come in ten years, but God saw me make lemonade with my lemons and He decided to add some sugar to it.

 Sometimes life throws us off track and we feel like we just jumped off a cliff and have no idea what's gonna happen after, believe me I have been through all the "why mes?" the" this wasn't supposed to happen like this", and I have learnt that God's plan is definitely the way to go. Especially in times of uncertainty. And lets face it, life is full of uncertainties. But sometimes we forget that God promised to make all things work for the good of those who love the Lord. Yes, ALL THINGS!!!! even the nasty. I have grown so much in the one year I have been in this new environment and I'm more than honored to be given the new opportunity to grow and blossom. This new position comes with a lot of responsibility but "to whom much is given, much is expected" and so I'm a little scared because I honestly wasn't ready or prepared. I'm still trying to fit in this new chair, and adjust to working with all these highly qualified professionals. I'm sure its going to be an interesting journey as I have so much to learn, which means I have more room to grow and although I'm scared, I am not worried because I trust in the will of God. 

We have all heard the saying "The will of God will never take you to where the Grace of God can not keep you" Easier said than done. My prayer every morning since I got this position has been that God sends me His grace to keep me and wisdom to guide me. Forgive this post for being all over the place, I just wanted to say that sometimes life knocks you down, and throws lemons at you, but if you dust yourself, and get back up, make some lemonade with those lemons, God will bring you sugar for an added taste. So don't dwell too much on what's going wrong, focus on how you can make the wrong work for you. 

I haven't figured out life yet, but this year has been so good to me, and it has taught me that when you let go and let God, He really does come though in the end. His will is definitely the way to go!!! It's only a matter of time, so just be patient

XoXo

On a Solo date? Sorry!!

So, the other day, I was having lunch at Tamarai by myself, well because it was a working day I was unable to find a "date" on short notice. I had been ill all week and when I finally got out of Hospital and smelt the fresh breeze i decided to give myself a treat and because I love the teas at Tamarai, It was the perfect place for me to chill on this hot Friday afternoon. As I was enjoying my delicious hot and spicy chicken wings, I saw a familiar face walk by, he stopped to say hello and asked if I was meeting someone there. To his surprise, I wasn't. But that's not the point of this post, when he found out that I was having lunch by my self, his response was "Bambi". Loosely translated as "oh dear" or "poor you". I gave him a warm smile and simple laugh and continued to indulge in this delicacy.

 As he walked away, I started to wonder, why do people think its pitiful if you go on a solo date? Does he think that I live a lonely and unhappy life because I choose to sit here and eat by myself? I have to admit, I was a bit offended, and here's why:
I live a very fulfilling life, probably more fulfilling than his. So much so that I don't really need people around me all the time to rectify my existence. I love me some me time, and anybody close to me will testify to how much I love my space. It has always puzzled my friends  how it is that I can go to a restaurant, by myself, order food, eat by my self, and live. But here's the thing, I like food, scratch that I LOVE FOOD!!!! So much so that I don't need a date to enjoy my meal. Sometimes I just want a good meal, and my friends aren't available or don't feel like eating because they are watching their weight, a problem I don't have. 

Sometimes I just cant even be bothered to call them because its an instant craving so I just drive out to whatever place I feel like eating, order my food, eat it in peace, without having someone poke at it, or try to taste it, instead of ordering their own, Yes I'm selfish like that. Actually that has to be my biggest pet peeve. People poking at my food, I would rather get you a whole new plate, than have you poke at my food. I rather find that much as I love company, I also like to enjoy my meals in peace. So my eating alone, or being on a "solo date" doesn't warrant your sympathy. It just simply means I wanted to eat alone.

Makes me wonder how many people out there are afraid of eating alone, because they don't want to feel alone. Just because you are surrounded by people doesn't mean you aren't lonely, just like being alone doesn't make you lonely. I've had the loneliest moments while surrounded by crowds of people and questioned my goals or purpose in life or purpose for being in the presence of these people, and I've had life changing decisions made while sitting by myself, because my mind was finally cleared of clutter and could now reason clearly. My point being, don't judge people based on what it looks like. There is nothing sorry about my life. I'm happier than I have been in years, and sitting by myself at a restaurant will not change that. Actually, sitting alone is what makes me happy. That I can afford that meal, is even a blessing on its own. So, the next time you see my sitting alone, just smile and wave, and wish me a Bon apetit, don't feel sorry for me, or that other person by themselves in the restaurant.
With Love
XoXo

Hello Food; for the glutton in me

If you know me, then you know I love my food, In fact, my food is about the only thing I don't share, no matter how much love I have for you, my food is off limits. If I wasn't naturally small, this would be a problem because my love for food is directly proportional  to my laziness. Bad habit I know, but old habits die hard. With all my love for food, and equal amount of Laziness,  you can imagine my excitement for this new app called "Hello Food"  where you can order your favorite dish online and have it delivered right to your doorstep. Kudos to you guys by the way, Because this has to be the coolest innovation ever!!! Not forgetting how much Kla is growing digitally.

 I am so impressed and proud that Uganda is actually having some positive innovations. People are finally thinking outside the box, becoming more creative and innovations like Hello Food are being born. Being an I.T professional this gives me encouragement knowing that All hope is not Lost. So if you are hungry and can't be bothered to drive to that Chinese restaurant, or simply can't decide on what to eat, just log on to Hello Food, or better yet download the app on your mobile , browse the options available, place your order and have it delivered in a few minutes. How cool is that? Say goodbye to starvation because your favorite restaurant is too far from your home/office and say Hello to healthier diets.
You'll thank me later so you're welcome in advance.
XoXo

Sometimes...

Sometimes we push people away and then be mad that they left, because you so desire to be abandoned, because you feel so alone, that you push away anything that looks like love, or healing, because you've been broken over, and over and over again. sometimes you have to stay loyal to people who don't want you to be loyal to them because your loyalty can inspire them but, you have to understand that you may not necessarily reap the benefits of your loyalty the next day and so you have to be patient and let your inner light shine anyway.

Don't let your bitterness cloud your light. Sometimes  you have to be broken over and over and over again so that you can never go back to who you used to be, that no matter how uncertain the road ahead seems, you know that it's better than going back to what it used to be. Whatever happens to you, don't let bitterness become your truth, because bitterness will steal your hope. 

Sometimes God can't send any warmth your way until you are willing to admit that you're freezing. That everyone has a season of struggle and sometimes it's okay to say I'm not okay. Most times we get so caught up busy pretending that we are not phased by the chills of life, yet all we really are doing is building bitterness and killing our souls. 

The moment you are willing to admit that you are feeling a little phased, or bitter, is the moment that God with come and give you beauty for ashes, and peace for despair.

Sometimes God will expose you to winter, to accelerate your harvest and so you don't have to let bitterness become your name but instead let your hope take the lead in your life. Winter is never meant to freeze your hope, it's meant to strengthen your roots. 

You can't let winter become your home, instead you have to let your roots grow, learn from it so you can blossom in the spring and embrace the beauty of seasons.

Stay Blessed

XOXO

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The simple life: As it should be

I recently took some time off, to reflect and also go on a mini vacay to Mt. Gahinga seeing as things had gotten a little hectic in my life. This vacay couldn't have come at a better time seeing as I was in a transition process in my life. I have been working on a few projects which I will be sure to let you in on as they unfold. So that explains why I have been quiet for a while... There I go again, rumbling.

Now on to the real reason for this post. My holiday was such a humbling experience, and here's why: I met the Batwa people. For those who don't know the Batwa, Here is a brief history:

Batwa Heritage Experience at Gahinga

"The Batwa of Uganda were forest dwellers who lived by gathering and hunting as the main source of food. They are believed to have lived in the Bwindi Impenetrable and Mgahinga National parks that border Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC) and Rwanda living mainly in areas bordering other Bantu Tribes.

In 1992, the lives of the Batwa pygmies changed forever. The Bwindi Impenetrable Forest became a national park and World Heritage Site to protect the 350 endangered mountain gorillas within its boundaries. The Batwa were evicted from the park. Since they had no title to land, they were given no compensation. The Batwa became conservation refugees in an unfamiliar, unforested world. Through the Batwa Experience, more can be known about the Batwa of Uganda.

They now live in communities where they have been resettled by NGOs in Uganda." (excerpt from Wikipedia) 

My life changed the day I met these people and here's why. These people used to live in the forest, but were displaced by Uganda Wildlife Authority (UWA) because they were trying to preserve the forest and the Mountain Gorilla in it's natural Habitat. Stephen, A mutwa we met expressed his disappointment with this displacement as he said they had no issues cohabiting with the animals in the forest. They had now been displaced and were being forced to adapt a new lifestyle that is considered by us to be more "normal". Except to the Batwa there is nothing normal about going to school, working to get paid so you can buy food. All of this is quite foreign to them seeing as the life they know is about going out to hunt, gather some fruits in the forest and that's all they need to be happy. When I spoke to Stephen on whether he would be happier going back to live in the forest as opposed to the new lifestyle they had been provided by the NGO's he replied with a strong YES! And so I thought to myself, "this man is crazy". Why would anyone want to live in the forest, with no internet, no phones, no fancy clothes or restaurants, Just really live on the basics of life.

The Batwa Entertaining us through dance at Gahinga

Then it hit me, I had it all wrong this whole time. The simple things are all one needs to be happy, but so often we look to the material things, the fancy things and think they will give us happiness, but no happiness from having the latest gadget can compare to the happiness that lit up Stephen's eyes at the mere thought of going back to the simple life. He just wasn't about that fancy life. He just wanted to be in the forest, make a fire using sticks, go hunting, and gather some herbs, come home to his wife and children and have some bonding time over dancing and singing. They did entertain us, and i must admit they are quite enjoyable people to live around. They are very warm and welcoming, despite their troubles, they smiled for us all the time, and didn't get tired of answering all the questions we had about their lifestyle. It was such a surreal moment, as I felt like I had been taken back in time, and living the history I always read about in the books. Oh the simple life. But not us, we are not like the Batwa. 

A twa woman in her natural Habitat ( straw house)

We don't want the simple life. We spend our days doing everything we can to make the most money we can, and then spend all of it on things that eventually don't even bring us the happiness we were looking for. We need to go back to the basics. Appreciate the simple things about life. I have never felt more loved and welcome, yet I was living among strangers. We live in a city that's overly populated, and yet we rarely come into contact with the people we know. Something happens in your neighbors house and you find out about it on The 9:00 O'clock news because his gate is so high up, and he has five security dogs, whatever happened to our culture of sitting around the fire, telling stories, and bonding with our peers and elders. It's no wonder the world has gone kukus today, with children lacking morals, knowing nothing about their history and culture and thinking it's the cool thing to do. I wept for my unborn children, for the confused world they will be born into. Will they ever know the simple life? I wonder... I do hope though that when the time comes, I will have enough time for them, to tell them about who they are, where they come from so that they not only become a part of their heritage, but also know that they belong and be proud.

Till Next time

Xo

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